There’s a good chance you’ve heard of the White Elephant Gift Exchange, even if you’ve never participated in one yet or don’t even know where the tradition began. Legend has it that the King of Siam gave white elephants to those who offended his courtiers rather than executing them. But this was an even more sinister punishment. The recipient had no choice but to gratefully accept the luxurious gift, even though he knew he could not afford to maintain such an animal. Inevitably, this will lead them to financial ruin.
Although this story is almost certainly not true, it led to the white elephant gift exchange, which is a modern holiday staple. Choosing the right white elephant gift means walking a fine line. It’s not just about buying something terrible and letting someone else take it home. Rather, it should just be useful or interesting enough to not be immediately thrown in the trash. So here are some suggestions that will not only make you laugh a little, but also make the recipient feel (a little) burdened.
KFC / Environment Log
The best white elephant gifts are those that spark a little intrigue the moment they enter your gift pile. And it’s impossible not to notice the life-sized 4.3-pound fire log wrapped in holiday paper. It would almost certainly dwarf any other present and would spark endless questions and speculation about what was inside the strange and surprisingly heavy box.
The fact that the comically large box contains a KFC fried chicken-scented fire log makes the whole gag even funnier. I have a gas fireplace at home, so unfortunately I have no idea what the KFC 11 Herbs & Spices Firelog actually smells like. Many online reviews claim it smells “exactly” like inside a KFC. Whether that appeals to you probably depends on your affinity for the Colonel. But I can’t think of a better gift to give to someone who really wants to know what’s inside that big, heavy box. — Carissa Bell, Senior Reporter
$34 on Amazon
Engadget
Banana Phone is exactly what you’d expect. It’s both a banana and a phone. It may not come with a SIM card or service plan, but the recipient can pair it with their smartphone via Bluetooth, so they can ditch their old $1,000+ cell phone and start talking the right way while eating fruit. You can start. In addition to making and receiving phone calls, you can also use Banana Phone with Google Assistant and Siri to ask about the weather or tell someone to “play Cruel Summer in Bananarama.” . Yes, Banana Phone also works as a Bluetooth speaker and has a range of 30 feet, so you can play music whenever you’re not using it for official business. — Valentina Palladino, Deputy Editor
$40 on Amazon
croquis
If the purpose of your white elephant gift is low-key torture, an alarm clock on wheels might be the best white elephant gift ever. (Well, unless you’re a bright-eyed, bushy-tailed weirdo who wakes up at 4:30 a.m. every day.) It’s an alarm clock that beeps when the recipient tries to hit the snooze button. Run away. I told them in no uncertain terms that it was time to wake up. And every morning they will sleepily stumble out of bed, swearing your name. – Terence O’Brien, former editor-in-chief
$36 on Amazon
eye mage
Who wouldn’t want their living room to look like a galaxy far, far away? Your gift-giver may have to fight with young children (or anyone else exchanging gifts) over this galaxy projector, which shines various light effects onto the ceiling with adjustable brightness and speed. yeah. Use it to create the perfect atmosphere for your next Star Wars viewing party, or to help you get a good night’s sleep each night. In addition to the included remote control and companion app, the projector also has a timer so you can set it to turn off as soon as you fall asleep. The mobile app lets you customize every aspect of your personal space field, from nebula and twinkle effects to swirling colors and music to mix and match (yes, it even has built-in speakers). Forget about boring old smart light bulbs. This galaxy projector is a smart device that will elevate anyone’s home environment. – vice president
$23 on Amazon
chop saver
What’s really the point of having a sushi and noodle night if you’re not eating with utensils protected by the Force? No, the answer is no. These lightsaber chopsticks light up different colors at the touch of a button and come with included batteries, so you can instantly protect your gift from evil forces. Sure, it’ll be a hit among Star Wars fans, but everyone will enjoy super-strong chopsticks for having impromptu “food fights” between bites of sashimi. – vice president
$10 on Amazon
apple
So while the recipient could easily throw this in the trash, we don’t think they would want to do that. Apple’s ridiculous, ridiculously priced polishing cloths may actually be a white elephant gift that people want to receive. Is it overkill for what it is? probably. Now that we have dozens of screens, both large and small, in our lives, is it basically useful for everyone? Absolutely. When it first launched in 2021, many people seemed to realize the usefulness of this thing, as they had to wait weeks for it to come back. Thankfully, it’s now more readily available. If you find it, this may be the most important thing. You can wander the mall or even scour Amazon trying to find the perfect white elephant gift. – vice president
$19 on Amazon
MMX
IRL weapons are inadequate unless the ammunition is sugar-based. The MMX Marshmallow Crossbow can fire “slightly dry” marshmallows up to 60 feet, so think of it as a tastier version of a Nerf gun. Just imagine. One person with this crossbow and a bag of jet puffs can deliver sugar bombs to everyone in the room without even getting off the couch. If that’s not a storybook holiday scenario, I don’t know what is. The launcher itself is highly artisanal, constructed from copper, aluminum, natural rubber, and North American hardwood, each machined and assembled by hand. The same is true in Canada. — Amy Skolheim, reporter
$99 at MMX
White Elephant Frequently Asked Questions
What is a white elephant?
White Elephant Gift Exchange is a party game usually played around the holidays where people exchange funny but impractical gifts.
How does the white elephant move?
Each group of people brings one wrapped gift to the White Elephant Gift Exchange. Each gift is typically of similar value. All the gifts are then placed together and the group decides the order in which each person will receive the gifts. The first person chooses a white elephant gift from the pile, unravels it, and the turn ends. Subsequent players can decide whether to unwrap another gift and claim it as their own, or steal a gift from someone who has already finished their turn. Rules can change from there, including guidelines on how often a single item can be stolen. Some say up to two times. The game ends when everyone has a white elephant gift.
Why is it called a white elephant?
The word “white elephant” is said to come from a legend in which the King of Siam gave a white elephant to a courtier who had angered the king. Although on the surface it seems like a luxurious gift, it is believed that the courtiers would be ruined by the cost of maintaining this animal.
Check out the rest of our gift ideas here.
